A Tale of Two Spiders
There were two spiders who lived down my bathtub, a larger older spider
and his younger smaller brother.
In the evenings they would come out of the drain and attempt to ascend
the sides of the bath but to no avail.
This morning I entered the bathroom and to my surprise saw that the
elder brother Edgar (after Edgar Alan Poe) had eaten his younger
brother, William (at first after William Blake, but now named after
William Henry Leonard Poe who coincidentally also died young, aged 24)
Edgar having left William's 8 legs scattered across the base of the
Refraining from washing Edgar away to certain death and cleaning
William's legs out of the bathtub I waited until this evening when
Edgar once again climbed out of the drain and began clambering the
sides and spreading webs across the low levels of the bath.
I had decided to punish him for his cruel act of fratricide.
Using a glass to capture Edgar, I then held the glass upwards with the
spider holding onto the brim and carried him to my window which I
opened and upturned the glass outside of.
Edgar had resourcefully spread a line of his silky thread from his
abdomen and swung down on this lifesaving cord to my floor,
attempting an audacious escape from justice, however I caught him and
once again, this time trapping him from gravity with a piece of paper
below the cup, dropped him out my window.
Although the fall is around 12ft, I dropped Edgar just over the edge so
it is likely his light mass will fall with a slow final velocity into
the plants below my window and that he should survive this air-borne
plummet (possibly his long legs reducing the impulse of his landing),
whether or not he will survive the freezing temperature that will
surely envelop my house's environs tonight is another matter.
Maybe this curious character will find a nook or cranny to create a
webbed bed in and stay warm until further notice, maybe he shall scurry
into the forrest to burrow to safety, maybe he shall freeze, maybe he
shall be devoured, or maybe he shall find another way into his old
home, this time not confined by the clinical white boundaries of the
Whatever the outcome I hope you will await news of his recurrence with
some laconic patience, and indeed eagerness, and I hope that this tale
has caused you some contemplation.